I have some old notes and scribbles here that I never shared. Perhaps it's because many are not directly about M 'n' m, and others are controversial (so best unshared), or so brief I must've intended to fatten them up by rambling, which is never good because good writing is lean. My writing isn't lean or good. Here are some notes:
I think confidence and humility can coexist beautifully. And I think that's called grace. It is a special kind of polish, or refinement. I wish I saw this in the mirror. I wish I saw it in the world more, too.
It is silly, of course, but there's wisdom in it, for us all to consider, when judging ourselves or anyone else, the tongue-in-cheek advice, "Pick your parents well."
I am finally reading "A Picture of Dorian
Gray." The story of Oscar Wilde is kind of a tragic one, but I can only
agree, so far (I am on page 9), that he is one of the best ever to turn a phrase. I really loved the Dublin Writer's Museum which Jeanette suggested we visit in Ireland. It houses some artifacts and original writings, letters, manuscripts, etc. from Wilde, Joyce, Swift, Shaw, Stoker, Yeats, Behan, Beckett. Geniuses, every one.
In a Puerto Rican shop today in Old San Juan, I saw this on a bracelet: "Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
I’ve only ever looked out of one pair of eyes. And I’ve only been inside of one head, one mind. (My own, of course.) Over seven billion people on the planet now. And how many before us? And only this single experience as pilot of a human mind and body? Yet life affords you another kind of perspective-changer: Being young and getting older. That is meaningful change. And, if we're lucky I guess, we keep getting older and older.
Megan asked me, "What's for breakfast?" I said, "Eggs."
She said, "Every time I see eggs, I think of baby chickens. I wanna put
eggs under heat lamps." Oh brother.
Do you ever give credence to the possibility that we reincarnate, that we've had past lives? And what if, when we were 'someone else,' we touched the lives of those who touch our lives now? What if we lived alongside our ancestors somehow, in some way? In mines or factories or foxholes with our grandfathers? What if you were the old doctor who saved your grandma's life when she was young? What if this, what if that... would you carry yourself differently? Do you want to carry yourself differently? Maybe we should ask ourselves questions like these and realize what we can't be sure of. Which, it seems to me, is another way of saying: realize what is possible.
Fundamentalists scare the shit out of me. And not just the jihadi and sharia variety. Some of my evangelical Christian friends I find uncomfortably myopic, rigid, and condemnatory. (For the record, I'm Christian, although, perfect example: certain Christians would say I'm not because my views are too liberal or flexible or inclusive or modern; and I respect, and often praise, other world religions.) I think the litmus test is simple: If someone is drowning, we shouldn't, of course, throw them a barbell, but neither should we even hesitate or put conditions on our help in that moment. Right? I feel like some people – ironically, very devout people, which is an admirable, disciplined trait, this unshakeable devotion – would need to think about it and pass judgement first – who is this and what do they believe and maybe I can convert them? And yet, pretending I'm Mr. Nice Guy, I sit here and espouse ideas like: People should enter the United States legally. Easy for me to say; I'm already here. But laws are important too. So voting on and modifying laws can be undertaken. I don't think anyone has ever suggested 'voting on and modifying laws' in the Bible, though. Leviticus and so on. I will shut up now....
I like this from Hemingway: "The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places." He also said: "There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; (be) superior to your former self." And a favorite of anyone who knows that thoughtfully jotting down anything at all is harder than it seems, hard to get started, hard to finish contentedly, impossible to do well enough to please one's inner critic: "There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." Hemingway was an active dude. At 61 he took his own life but it's suspected that physical and mental deterioration due to a blood disorder may have played a part. Similar to Robin Williams' unbearable situation perhaps. It doesn't sound like either was afflicted with the same kind of pernicious depression as David Foster Wallace.
Megan asked me, "Why does fear have to be a thing?"
I want to shrink my amygdala. I hope, via genetics, I didn't gift overactive ones to M 'n' m. Although, I would argue there are benefits to a certain amount of sensitivity, alertness, awareness, conscientiousness, competitiveness, intelligence, energy; all of which are bolstered I would think by a little anxiety.
I am not surprised that the words 'arrogance' and 'ignorance' have a similar ring and flow to them when pronounced.
I read something recently in which the author referred to the world as 'morally squishy.' Clever way to put it. But on some level, I feel like we always know what the right thing to do is. There are two sides to every story, but even so…. Kindness is important. But if kindness to one party harms another party, then what? Are there laws involved? Can a majority opinion be reached? In my opinion, there’s more of a firmness to the world, regarding right and wrong; it’s not that squishy. But it’s not always morally black and white either; to believe that is insane. How much do parents impact moral development in their children? Entirely? No. But considerably. Substantially. And actions speak louder than words.
We catch smallmouth bass at Paul's. Also walleye and northern, but smallmouth are the pound-for-pound champs; they fight like beserkers (a Viking term; worth reading about). They're surprisingly powerful and I love that combination: that of being powerful, I mean, but not having a big mouth.
Paul – a nearly lifelong friend of Papa Mike's – has a home, boats, and other toys on Island Lake near Duluth. It's not a busy place. Bears, wolves, bald eagles, loons, and prized fish live there, in big expanses of wilderness, water, and open air. I'm grateful Michael gets to experience it every year, and I do too. Megan doesn't love to fish, and we spend many, many hours doing that, but I want her to see it someday, too. Such places exist and they have charms, and also challenges, quite different than those encountered in, say, downtown Chicago. Thank you, Paul.
It’s challenging to be a great father and have a great career. It’s even more challenging to be a great mother and have a great career. These are controversial comments. But I see parents everywhere taking on the task – parenting, that is – with passion, patience, aplomb, and it’s inspiring to me. Because I know it’s not easy. It’s not stress-free, or inexpensive, or undemanding, or predictable. It’s wonderful though.
I just realized that in the 'Marvel Universe' and the 'DC Universe,' the heroes that headline movies are always not parents. At least Disney / Pixar has The Incredibles.
Why do we seek to provoke inelegance, and disgrace, instead of elegance and grace. In the news media, especially. Social media, despite its vulnerability to misuse and nonsense, is generally better, I think, at exposing us to uplifting things, family photos and good news and opportunities to support, greet, compliment, and advise each other. I’m really only familiar with Facebook though. Not Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or any others.
They say the teen psyche is powerfully averse to criticism and embarrassment.... This might be a very bad thing when cocktailed up with social media.
I don't know if Michael is setting hearts aflutter in junior high. But I do know that my dugout – I'll call it that since I'm the head coach – was visited by five or six girls yesterday, all chipper and chatty and looking for Michael and a couple other guys. When the right girl was in the audience, I was eager to show off. I don't know if this effect made me better or worse; I hope these guys play better. Distractions are okay sometimes if they inspire.
I've bought so many great books for next to nothing at Goodwill stores. I feel guilty. I confess. My latest purchase? A pristine copy of The Varieties of Religious Experience by William James. Light bedtime reading.
I don't believe I live in a 'profoundly sick society' or even a 'sick society' – there are too many good things going on, and good people – but I find myself drawn to this quote: "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society." It's from Krishnamurti. I will learn more about him. Off to YouTube for clips and documentaries.
The two Michaels (Papa Mike and Michael) are both list-makers and productive guys. It appears that lists inspire productivity and creativity. And organization. Well then, I need to make more lists.
Do you ever give credence to the possibility that we reincarnate, that we've had past lives? And what if, when we were 'someone else,' we touched the lives of those who touch our lives now? What if we lived alongside our ancestors somehow, in some way? In mines or factories or foxholes with our grandfathers? What if you were the old doctor who saved your grandma's life when she was young? What if this, what if that... would you carry yourself differently? Do you want to carry yourself differently? Maybe we should ask ourselves questions like these and realize what we can't be sure of. Which, it seems to me, is another way of saying: realize what is possible.
Fundamentalists scare the shit out of me. And not just the jihadi and sharia variety. Some of my evangelical Christian friends I find uncomfortably myopic, rigid, and condemnatory. (For the record, I'm Christian, although, perfect example: certain Christians would say I'm not because my views are too liberal or flexible or inclusive or modern; and I respect, and often praise, other world religions.) I think the litmus test is simple: If someone is drowning, we shouldn't, of course, throw them a barbell, but neither should we even hesitate or put conditions on our help in that moment. Right? I feel like some people – ironically, very devout people, which is an admirable, disciplined trait, this unshakeable devotion – would need to think about it and pass judgement first – who is this and what do they believe and maybe I can convert them? And yet, pretending I'm Mr. Nice Guy, I sit here and espouse ideas like: People should enter the United States legally. Easy for me to say; I'm already here. But laws are important too. So voting on and modifying laws can be undertaken. I don't think anyone has ever suggested 'voting on and modifying laws' in the Bible, though. Leviticus and so on. I will shut up now....
I like this from Hemingway: "The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places." He also said: "There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; (be) superior to your former self." And a favorite of anyone who knows that thoughtfully jotting down anything at all is harder than it seems, hard to get started, hard to finish contentedly, impossible to do well enough to please one's inner critic: "There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." Hemingway was an active dude. At 61 he took his own life but it's suspected that physical and mental deterioration due to a blood disorder may have played a part. Similar to Robin Williams' unbearable situation perhaps. It doesn't sound like either was afflicted with the same kind of pernicious depression as David Foster Wallace.
Megan asked me, "Why does fear have to be a thing?"
I want to shrink my amygdala. I hope, via genetics, I didn't gift overactive ones to M 'n' m. Although, I would argue there are benefits to a certain amount of sensitivity, alertness, awareness, conscientiousness, competitiveness, intelligence, energy; all of which are bolstered I would think by a little anxiety.
I am not surprised that the words 'arrogance' and 'ignorance' have a similar ring and flow to them when pronounced.
I read something recently in which the author referred to the world as 'morally squishy.' Clever way to put it. But on some level, I feel like we always know what the right thing to do is. There are two sides to every story, but even so…. Kindness is important. But if kindness to one party harms another party, then what? Are there laws involved? Can a majority opinion be reached? In my opinion, there’s more of a firmness to the world, regarding right and wrong; it’s not that squishy. But it’s not always morally black and white either; to believe that is insane. How much do parents impact moral development in their children? Entirely? No. But considerably. Substantially. And actions speak louder than words.
We catch smallmouth bass at Paul's. Also walleye and northern, but smallmouth are the pound-for-pound champs; they fight like beserkers (a Viking term; worth reading about). They're surprisingly powerful and I love that combination: that of being powerful, I mean, but not having a big mouth.
Paul – a nearly lifelong friend of Papa Mike's – has a home, boats, and other toys on Island Lake near Duluth. It's not a busy place. Bears, wolves, bald eagles, loons, and prized fish live there, in big expanses of wilderness, water, and open air. I'm grateful Michael gets to experience it every year, and I do too. Megan doesn't love to fish, and we spend many, many hours doing that, but I want her to see it someday, too. Such places exist and they have charms, and also challenges, quite different than those encountered in, say, downtown Chicago. Thank you, Paul.
It’s challenging to be a great father and have a great career. It’s even more challenging to be a great mother and have a great career. These are controversial comments. But I see parents everywhere taking on the task – parenting, that is – with passion, patience, aplomb, and it’s inspiring to me. Because I know it’s not easy. It’s not stress-free, or inexpensive, or undemanding, or predictable. It’s wonderful though.
I just realized that in the 'Marvel Universe' and the 'DC Universe,' the heroes that headline movies are always not parents. At least Disney / Pixar has The Incredibles.
Why do we seek to provoke inelegance, and disgrace, instead of elegance and grace. In the news media, especially. Social media, despite its vulnerability to misuse and nonsense, is generally better, I think, at exposing us to uplifting things, family photos and good news and opportunities to support, greet, compliment, and advise each other. I’m really only familiar with Facebook though. Not Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or any others.
They say the teen psyche is powerfully averse to criticism and embarrassment.... This might be a very bad thing when cocktailed up with social media.
I don't know if Michael is setting hearts aflutter in junior high. But I do know that my dugout – I'll call it that since I'm the head coach – was visited by five or six girls yesterday, all chipper and chatty and looking for Michael and a couple other guys. When the right girl was in the audience, I was eager to show off. I don't know if this effect made me better or worse; I hope these guys play better. Distractions are okay sometimes if they inspire.
I've bought so many great books for next to nothing at Goodwill stores. I feel guilty. I confess. My latest purchase? A pristine copy of The Varieties of Religious Experience by William James. Light bedtime reading.
I don't believe I live in a 'profoundly sick society' or even a 'sick society' – there are too many good things going on, and good people – but I find myself drawn to this quote: "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society." It's from Krishnamurti. I will learn more about him. Off to YouTube for clips and documentaries.
The two Michaels (Papa Mike and Michael) are both list-makers and productive guys. It appears that lists inspire productivity and creativity. And organization. Well then, I need to make more lists.
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