#290

On his first day as a teenager, Michael was showering and broke the glass door which shattered and sent shards into his feet, one of them very deeply. I'm told it was bloody; I wasn't there. We can take this story in several directions, but two of them I'll avoid, specifically: 1) a common suspicion of what teenage boys do in the shower and 2) how I've mercifully missed every one of my kids' serious or semi-serious injuries including Michael knocking out a front tooth and Michael gashing his head on the corner of a file cabinet, and Meg splitting her chin open and also getting bit in the face by a dog. Regarding 2) and violating my promise not to comment further (for fear of documenting the case against me for DCFS, for one thing), I'm generally at work when these things happen, bloody messes all, although I was on a golf course in Galena, Illinois – striking the ball very well, albeit temporarily, as you can imagine, but that's usually how it goes for me with or without nontrivial distraction – when my cellphone buzzed in the golf cart and I was notified that the most precious thing in my life had been bitten and punctured very near her eye by the teeth of a dog. My next shot I hit fat and short into the water. Ironically, to this day, Meg loves dogs more than anything on the planet. She asks for a puppy every single day. Should I remind her that a dog...? No? Okay, back to Michael and his newly-minted teenhood, and the fact it kicked-off with an injury. I think Michael is lucky. Glass can do terrible damage to human flesh. So can file cabinet corners and canine jaws. So I'm grateful today, although here's my dilemma: is it really 'looking on the bright side' to applaud or accept something because 'it could've been worse?' This is a stupid philosophical quandary that has plagued me forever. I agree with Jack Kerouac that 'comparisons are odious,' but what about expectations? Expectations are comparisons, aren't they? Comparisons to hoped-for or ideal outcomes? And the only time I'm disappointed by something is when I expect it to be better. Although, why demonize disappointment? I expect M 'n' m to behave appropriately and get good grades. We can't be free of expectations. The rule of law and civilization itself would crumble. What do M 'n' m expect of themselves and their lives? Will these expectations inspire or disappoint? I'm rooting for the former, of course, and I'll try to coach them accordingly. But what do I know? In general, I hope M 'n' m stay positive and productive, expect to be so in fact, and when there's a hiccup or curveball or fuckup or injury, they roll with it, keep truckin', count blessings, find silver linings, and live life. And the teenage years can be an intense part of one's life. Good luck, Michael. So far, so good.