Dad Entry #194

Megan comes out of her room sometimes in an outfit that just doesn't work, for whatever reason, like the sporting of brown leggings with ankle socks and black loafers, and I feel a pinch of something in my heart, and in that instant I love her just a tiny bit more, which isn't even possible. I'm no fashion oracle, no metrosexual trendsetter, but I have a sense and awareness (and my share of insecurities). Speaking of appearances, I wonder if Michael will ever:

1) Refuse to go a day without hair styling products
2) Be obsessed with shoes, sunglasses, and watches
3) Moisturize, exfoliate, and shape his eyebrows
4) See a stylist instead of a barber, because barbers don't do highlights
5) Wear Calvin Klein boxer-briefs under designer trousers
6) Put thousands of dollars on a Banana Republic card
7) Get rich and still not buy a pickup truck
8) Drink wine instead of beer, and only after loud pronouncements about estate and vintage
9) Spend more time fluffing, buffing, and staring in a mirror than his date
10) Make her lamb shanks and risotto for dinner and eggs Benedict for breakfast, all from scratch

I plagiarized some of these, and I'm guilty of a couple of them. I groom and tweeze; I grow hair on my earlobes now. My kids, who miss nothing, are aware of my routines. Papa Mike is batting even higher against this list. He owned an impressive pickup recently, but has a biannual habit of trading and buying new, expensive vehicles. His collection of watches and sunglasses is kingly. I would be worse too, if I had money. I am not making fun; style is important. Because confidence is important. Image is important. My children, like everyone, will consider how they appear, and what qualities, identity, and essence they project. At least I hope so. I think everyone does, especially those who say otherwise, like badasses with spectacular boots, wallet chains, tatts, and intimidating – but fanatically pampered and accessorized – trucks. I betcha those guys can also braise a nice lamb in a red wine reduction with rosemary over almond rice pilaf and julienned vegetables. Or something like that. I don't know what I'm talking about again.