#366

I like picking up Megan. When she hopped in the car yesterday, I was stricken with an un-rare, unsurprising manic moment of needing to express to her how much I love her. At this point in our lives together, we both roll our eyes, but I continue, dauntless, like this: "Meg, I hope you have a baby boy someday, and then maybe you'll finally understand how much I love you. That might do the trick. You know, the mother-son / father-daughter thing; they're cliches for a reason; a baby boy, a son, that might wipe the windshield for you, so to speak, for a clear view of this kind of eternal sunrise." Meg was confused. Hell, so was I; I wasn't making sense. Then I remembered the puppies. Meg is helping a friend with a litter of Rottweilers. They are brand-spanking-new; their eyes, unopened; their stubby, little legs, useless (although Meg said some can army crawl). Rather indifferently, I thought, Meg told me the boys push the girls away from Mom's milk if it must be fought over. I thought, the male-female dynamic is consistent across all life forms... but then I thought of Praying Mantises. Females get the last laugh there, for sure. And women live longer, have better hair, and in the '70s and '80s looked less hilarious, than men, with perms. See, being female has its advantages. But the Praying Mantis thing, I had to look up: Do they always kill the males? That's not very nice, girls.

From the internet: "Yes, it's true, female praying mantises do cannibalize their sex partners. In some instances, she'll even behead the poor chap before they've consummated their relationship. As it turns out, a male mantis is an even better lover when his brain, which controls inhibition, is detached from his abdominal ganglion, which controls the actual act of copulation. But most instances of sexual suicide in mantises occur in the confines of a laboratory setting. In the wild, scientists believe the male partner gets munched on less than 30% of the time."

Wow. Things I want to unlearn. And wouldn't that be sexual homicide, not suicide? Does the male mantis know the sacrifice he's about to make (hence, it's called suicide)? Like he gets his affairs in order, then takes one for the team. For his unborn kids. I know they're bugs, but the whole thing sounds more like murder to me. Anyway, back to Meg, puppies, and expressing love. I said, "Actually, Meg, I love you more than you love those puppies!" I thought I'd nailed it! "Can you believe it?!" I added, gushing! Meg said, "Yeah, because sometimes I don't like those puppies because they smell." She's a little cynical, but honest. And she knows my game.