October 2008
When Megan uses the 'big girl potty' now, we reward her with chocolate chips. Good job Megs!
Public restrooms are tricky. I carefully pick a stall and clean; you
know, pre-flush, seat-wipe, TP-prep, and so on. Then I help her get
situated so she doesn't fall in. I beg her not to touch anything!
Together we negotiate uncooperative waistbands, tights, dresses,
sometimes a dangling shoe. And on the way out I prevent her from
investigating things like pink urinal cakes. "Look, Daddy, it's pink!" She
points and steps toward it. No! I shepherd her toward the exit. She says, "I did it, Daddy," and beams a smile and I love, love, love her.
Michael is learning to spell and read. I love his enthusiasm. The other day, he said, "Daddy, I know how to spell 'talk'! It's T-O-C!" Ah yes, we begin phonetically. I high-fived him and said, "You'll be reading your Star Wars books in no time!"
Michael is facing his toughest annual decision: what to be for Halloween. And he empathizes with others, apparently; he said, "Daddy, there's a great Obi-Wan costume if you're not sure who to be."
Meggie wants to go to the movie 'heater' to see Madagascar. Michael said we need another 'gallop' of milk. Megan likes to eat at California Pizza 'Chicken' but Michael prefers a sandwich and shake at 'Hot' Belly. And so it goes.
March 2009
Michael mentions his penis a lot these days. Or not, but any use of the word is glaring. In the bathtub, he'll say, "Megan kicked my penis and that is bad for my penis." I agree, of course. I advise him to turn when Meg submerges so she doesn't kick his penis. Later, he says, "It would really hurt if my penis got stomped." Yes, this is true. I nod and want to change the subject. But Michael giggles and then Megan asks if her toy puppy has a penis. Okay, enough! What else can we call it?! Private parts?
Michael knows I have a job and that most days I leave for it. He
said, "Daddy, take this page to work and ask your boss if you can color
it."
We encouraged Michael to try showering. He asked, "Do Jedi take baths or showers?" I know Michael and his wonderful brain; I brace myself for more questions. "What about Yoda and Kit Fisto?" (These two are distinctly not human.) What about superheroes? Do they wash? Do they launder their costumes and capes? Do they eat? Back to Yoda (who is really short), does he use a stool at the sink like Megan? And here's what I wanna know: Do Jedi ever reach for the TP and find it down to the cardboard? Cause that happens to me a lot around here.
Megan is majestically beautiful, even when she has crusties on her face. Her eyes are big and clear. Her lashes, long. Her voice, sweet. Her mini-shoes, jeans, sweaters, and summer dresses, adorable. Her tiny painted nails. Her hugs, laughter, tears. Her snot. When she clings to me in the close presence of strangers... well, that is inexpressible; but it gives me the strongest and rawest feeling of purpose I've ever experienced.
Last weekend, I asked Megan if I could swoop her up and whisk her across a busy street. She said, "I can walk, Dad. Don't worry, I won't even get killed at all." Thank you, Sweetheart, that's very reassuring.
Michael told me how tests work. He explained they had one at school, and it involved writing, and they were not allowed to look at anyone else's paper. I listened. I also thought, sorry kid, you got a few thousand more to go. I love how little kids explain things, eagerly, sincerely, and always assuming the subject is as new to their audience as it is to them. I do nothing to dispel this; I hang on every word.
It's my birthday. In the jargon of cars, a new obsession for Michael, I told him I am a 1975 model. I said Tiger Woods is also. He wasn't impressed. And Angelina Jolie. Still not impressed. (I agree with him; I find many actresses more beautiful.) I told Megan that David Beckham was build in 1975. No reaction. I told her David Beckham is so cool he married a Spice Girl. Nothing. I told the kids it's time for cake and ice cream. Aha! Something they understand.
Megan said, "When I grow up, I'm never gonna cry."
Saturday, February 23, 2019
Monday, February 11, 2019
Stuff About Things #30
“Life is what happens while you're making other plans.
― John Lennon
“You change the world by being yourself.
― Yoko Ono
“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.
― Joseph Campbell
“Cherish forever what makes you unique, cause you're really a yawn if it goes.
― Better Midler
"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
― Oscar Wilde
“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine; it is lethal.”
― Paulo Coelho
“The best feedback is what we don't want to hear.”
― George Raveling
“Every day of our lives, we are on the verge of making those slight changes that would make all the difference.”
— Mignon McLaughlin
“All of our miseries are nothing but attachment.”
— Osho
”
“The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.”
— Bertrand Russell
“
“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”
— Mark Twain
“The force of the temptation which urges us to seek for such evidence and appearances as are in agreement with our desires, and to disregard those which oppose them, is wonderfully great. In this respect we are all, more or less, active promoters of error. In place of practicing wholesome self-abnegation, we ever make the wish the father to the thought: we receive as friendly that which agrees with us, we resist with dislike that which opposes us; whereas the very reverse is required by every dictate of common sense.
“You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.”
― Robin Williams
“Experience is the best teacher in life.
— Lebron James
“Well, they’re all (very competitive), or they wouldn’t get to where they are. Probably the two biggest assassins, where, when they look at you, you feel ‘Okay, I’m gonna lose to this guy,’ were (Michael) Jordan, I think Jordan is the best player ever, and Kobe Bryant. Their preparation and their ability to just focus is off the charts.
— Coach Mike Krzyzewski …. When asked, “If you had to pick among the pro players you have coached and witnessed (in the Olympics and international play), who would you say is the most competitive player you’ve ever coached?
“Effort is grossly underrated.”
― Gary Vaynerchuk
“A surplus of effort can overcome a deficit of confidence.
― Sonia Sotomayor
“You have to understand your own personal DNA. Don’t do things because I do them or Steve Jobs or Mark Cuban tried it. You need to know your personal brand and stay true to it.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to trends and fads and popular opinion.
― Jack Kerouac
“Be faithful to that which exists within yourself.
― Andre Gide
“Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.
― Tallulah Bankhead
“We cannot put off living until we are ready. The most salient characteristic of life is its urgency, 'here and now' without any possible postponement. Life is fired at us point-blank.
― Jose Ortega y Gasset
“If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.
― Tallulah Bankhead
“And yes, I was afraid. You're never not afraid. I'm still afraid.... But my fear of failure never approached in magnitude my fear of what if. What if I never tried at all?
― Will Ferrell
Nowhere is there place
To stop and live, so only
Everywhere will do:
Each and every grass-made hut soon leaves
Its place within this withering world.
― Saigyo
― John Lennon
“You change the world by being yourself.
― Yoko Ono
“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.
― Joseph Campbell
“Cherish forever what makes you unique, cause you're really a yawn if it goes.
― Better Midler
"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
― Oscar Wilde
“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine; it is lethal.”
― Paulo Coelho
“The best feedback is what we don't want to hear.”
― George Raveling
“Every day of our lives, we are on the verge of making those slight changes that would make all the difference.”
— Mignon McLaughlin
“All of our miseries are nothing but attachment.”
— Osho
“The less people know, the more stubbornly they know it.”
―
―
”
— Bertrand Russell
“
“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”
— Mark Twain
“The force of the temptation which urges us to seek for such evidence and appearances as are in agreement with our desires, and to disregard those which oppose them, is wonderfully great. In this respect we are all, more or less, active promoters of error. In place of practicing wholesome self-abnegation, we ever make the wish the father to the thought: we receive as friendly that which agrees with us, we resist with dislike that which opposes us; whereas the very reverse is required by every dictate of common sense.
―
“Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
— Carl Jung“Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.
“You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.”
― Robin Williams
“Experience is the best teacher in life.
— Lebron James
“Well, they’re all (very competitive), or they wouldn’t get to where they are. Probably the two biggest assassins, where, when they look at you, you feel ‘Okay, I’m gonna lose to this guy,’ were (Michael) Jordan, I think Jordan is the best player ever, and Kobe Bryant. Their preparation and their ability to just focus is off the charts.
— Coach Mike Krzyzewski …. When asked, “If you had to pick among the pro players you have coached and witnessed (in the Olympics and international play), who would you say is the most competitive player you’ve ever coached?
“Effort is grossly underrated.”
― Gary Vaynerchuk
“A surplus of effort can overcome a deficit of confidence.
― Sonia Sotomayor
“You have to understand your own personal DNA. Don’t do things because I do them or Steve Jobs or Mark Cuban tried it. You need to know your personal brand and stay true to it.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to trends and fads and popular opinion.
― Jack Kerouac
“Be faithful to that which exists within yourself.
― Andre Gide
“Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.
― Tallulah Bankhead
“We cannot put off living until we are ready. The most salient characteristic of life is its urgency, 'here and now' without any possible postponement. Life is fired at us point-blank.
― Jose Ortega y Gasset
“If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.
― Tallulah Bankhead
“And yes, I was afraid. You're never not afraid. I'm still afraid.... But my fear of failure never approached in magnitude my fear of what if. What if I never tried at all?
― Will Ferrell
Nowhere is there place
To stop and live, so only
Everywhere will do:
Each and every grass-made hut soon leaves
Its place within this withering world.
― Saigyo
Sunday, February 10, 2019
Retro M 'n' m – 2008 – #6
August 2008
Megan is a pacifier connoisseur. She's selective about color (pink), brand (Avent), type (multi-piece), airflow (yes), texture (smooth; there's a brushed finish she bitterly rejects) and quality/durability; yesterday, she took a 'paci,' grimaced, and said, "It has a crack." She was right; I found a tiny puncture in the silicone. These details can ruin an otherwise satisfying experience. I can't help but think of the preferences and routines of smokers. Camels, menthols, after a meal, with a drink. Megan only gets her paci at nap and bedtime now. And she handles it with impressive dexterity, just like a seasoned smoker who can light a cigarette in a windstorm. Kicking the habit won't be easy.
September 2008
Megan's hair is finally long. It's soft and beautiful. I love it. I love her. But she needs a haircut. It's constantly in her face, and then in the caramel she dips her apples in, the glue she uses for art, her oatmeal, toothpaste, syrup, stickers, yogurt, and so on.
On labor day, Papa Mike, Uncle Scott, and I played nine holes with Alissa and Michael. Alissa is impossibly cute and a good little ball-striker. Michael didn't hit many shots but he drove the golf cart for me and Papa. He sat in between us and did his best, despite short legs, to put the "pedal to the medal." At one point, Michael raced down a hill and turned. Papa Mike and I both white-knuckled our respective side rails and screamed "STOP!" Michael, startled, took his foot off the gas, which likely saved the cart, and the three of us, from flipping and barrel-rolling down the hill.
Darth Michael is strong with the Force. He has a lightsaber (a plastic telescoping one from Target) and his skills are prodigious for a young Jedi. I act as a training partner (with my skinny, yellow wiffle ball bat) and have the welts on my forearms and knuckles to prove it. Michael's aggressive attacks aren't easy to deflect. Thankfully, Jedi Knights adhere to a code, with tenets like 'never whack your little sister' and 'don't wallop your dad when he's not looking.' Megan wants to play too. She will pick up anything that resembles a lightsaber and swing it and talk about Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker and 'The Yoda.'
Megan is starting to use the 'big potty.' I have mixed feelings about this. A potty-trained Megan is too grown-up!
Whenever Megan sees any teams playing baseball, or football, or any sport on TV, she says, "Look, Daddy, the Cubs!" I have mixed feelings about this, too. I want the best for Megan and 100 years of futility isn't the best. But Wrigley is the best, and Chicago is the best. I guess we love our lovable losers. They've actually won their division two years in a row. But nobody disappoints like the Cubs; they've also been swept in the playoffs two years in a row.
Megan is a pacifier connoisseur. She's selective about color (pink), brand (Avent), type (multi-piece), airflow (yes), texture (smooth; there's a brushed finish she bitterly rejects) and quality/durability; yesterday, she took a 'paci,' grimaced, and said, "It has a crack." She was right; I found a tiny puncture in the silicone. These details can ruin an otherwise satisfying experience. I can't help but think of the preferences and routines of smokers. Camels, menthols, after a meal, with a drink. Megan only gets her paci at nap and bedtime now. And she handles it with impressive dexterity, just like a seasoned smoker who can light a cigarette in a windstorm. Kicking the habit won't be easy.
September 2008
Megan's hair is finally long. It's soft and beautiful. I love it. I love her. But she needs a haircut. It's constantly in her face, and then in the caramel she dips her apples in, the glue she uses for art, her oatmeal, toothpaste, syrup, stickers, yogurt, and so on.
On labor day, Papa Mike, Uncle Scott, and I played nine holes with Alissa and Michael. Alissa is impossibly cute and a good little ball-striker. Michael didn't hit many shots but he drove the golf cart for me and Papa. He sat in between us and did his best, despite short legs, to put the "pedal to the medal." At one point, Michael raced down a hill and turned. Papa Mike and I both white-knuckled our respective side rails and screamed "STOP!" Michael, startled, took his foot off the gas, which likely saved the cart, and the three of us, from flipping and barrel-rolling down the hill.
Darth Michael is strong with the Force. He has a lightsaber (a plastic telescoping one from Target) and his skills are prodigious for a young Jedi. I act as a training partner (with my skinny, yellow wiffle ball bat) and have the welts on my forearms and knuckles to prove it. Michael's aggressive attacks aren't easy to deflect. Thankfully, Jedi Knights adhere to a code, with tenets like 'never whack your little sister' and 'don't wallop your dad when he's not looking.' Megan wants to play too. She will pick up anything that resembles a lightsaber and swing it and talk about Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker and 'The Yoda.'
Megan is starting to use the 'big potty.' I have mixed feelings about this. A potty-trained Megan is too grown-up!
Whenever Megan sees any teams playing baseball, or football, or any sport on TV, she says, "Look, Daddy, the Cubs!" I have mixed feelings about this, too. I want the best for Megan and 100 years of futility isn't the best. But Wrigley is the best, and Chicago is the best. I guess we love our lovable losers. They've actually won their division two years in a row. But nobody disappoints like the Cubs; they've also been swept in the playoffs two years in a row.
Tuesday, February 5, 2019
Retro M 'n' m – 2008 – #5
July 2008
Michael had a great week at Gramma's. It's Papa's house too, but Gramma gets top billing, kind of like A-Rod over Jeter now at Yankee Stadium. Of course, both are All-Stars. And even the Gramma-Michael relationship was strained a few times in their 8 days together. For example, Michael announced he and Papa should "put Gramma in jail" after she firmly ended playtime in favor of bedtime. And Gramma insisted that Michael go potty which he otherwise refuses to do until his eyes water and he pees "like a firehose" as Papa describes it. Michael asked every night how many days he had left, followed by negotiations for more. He cried on Saturday, his last day. But he will go back, and often, I promised him.
We visited Clear Lake. Uncle Bill drove the boat fast! The kids loved it, and Megan was especially breathless when gibbering about it afterward. I love it when Megan talks. About anything. Both kids swam and played in sand so much we're still finding grains of it in their ears, nails, in every crack and crevice.
There were four big dogs at Clear Lake, and I don't blame Meg for not trusting an animal that bit her in the face. She isn't afraid of Belle, but Belle is so wonderfully passive she's like Dalai-Lama-level imperturbable; a toddler could take away her dinner, tug on her ear, and poke her in the eye and Belle would only smile. Megan loves Beller-Feller but screamed whenever the other dogs came close. She even swatted at them a few times, swinging wildly with one arm while clinging to my leg with the other. Perfect. When Megan clings to me = heaven.
We saw Kung Fu Panda in the theater. Right in the middle of it, Michael turned to me and said, "You were right, Daddy, this IS a cool movie!" It was over-stimulating for Megan though. Her eyes were very wide and when I whispered to her, "Are you okay, Love?" she began chattering unintelligibly. I heard words like 'fast' and 'loud' and 'flying' and 'crash.' Then I reminded her to lower her voice (in the theater). Megan is adorable at movies. Her little legs, straight out in front of her, barely reach the edge of her seat. We prop her up, give her some popcorn, and she's quite happy.
Last night at bedtime, I challenged Michael to a round of "I love you more than...." I led off with an impressive volley of massive quantities. "Michael, I love you more than all the water in the ocean, all the stars in the sky, and" – my kicker, my trump, my coup de grace! – "all the Legos ever made!" I figured this was unbeatable, and the Lego reference sheer genius. (Legos are the most popular toy at home lately.) I inhaled smugly. But Michael is a cool cat. He kept his composure, paused, countered: "Daddy, I love you more than a hundred and a thousand Jupiter's." Ooh. It was a good one, a real good one. A confusing mix of numbers and the largest planet in our solar system?! Damn. The best I could argue for after that was a tie.
Michael had a great week at Gramma's. It's Papa's house too, but Gramma gets top billing, kind of like A-Rod over Jeter now at Yankee Stadium. Of course, both are All-Stars. And even the Gramma-Michael relationship was strained a few times in their 8 days together. For example, Michael announced he and Papa should "put Gramma in jail" after she firmly ended playtime in favor of bedtime. And Gramma insisted that Michael go potty which he otherwise refuses to do until his eyes water and he pees "like a firehose" as Papa describes it. Michael asked every night how many days he had left, followed by negotiations for more. He cried on Saturday, his last day. But he will go back, and often, I promised him.
We visited Clear Lake. Uncle Bill drove the boat fast! The kids loved it, and Megan was especially breathless when gibbering about it afterward. I love it when Megan talks. About anything. Both kids swam and played in sand so much we're still finding grains of it in their ears, nails, in every crack and crevice.
There were four big dogs at Clear Lake, and I don't blame Meg for not trusting an animal that bit her in the face. She isn't afraid of Belle, but Belle is so wonderfully passive she's like Dalai-Lama-level imperturbable; a toddler could take away her dinner, tug on her ear, and poke her in the eye and Belle would only smile. Megan loves Beller-Feller but screamed whenever the other dogs came close. She even swatted at them a few times, swinging wildly with one arm while clinging to my leg with the other. Perfect. When Megan clings to me = heaven.
We saw Kung Fu Panda in the theater. Right in the middle of it, Michael turned to me and said, "You were right, Daddy, this IS a cool movie!" It was over-stimulating for Megan though. Her eyes were very wide and when I whispered to her, "Are you okay, Love?" she began chattering unintelligibly. I heard words like 'fast' and 'loud' and 'flying' and 'crash.' Then I reminded her to lower her voice (in the theater). Megan is adorable at movies. Her little legs, straight out in front of her, barely reach the edge of her seat. We prop her up, give her some popcorn, and she's quite happy.
Last night at bedtime, I challenged Michael to a round of "I love you more than...." I led off with an impressive volley of massive quantities. "Michael, I love you more than all the water in the ocean, all the stars in the sky, and" – my kicker, my trump, my coup de grace! – "all the Legos ever made!" I figured this was unbeatable, and the Lego reference sheer genius. (Legos are the most popular toy at home lately.) I inhaled smugly. But Michael is a cool cat. He kept his composure, paused, countered: "Daddy, I love you more than a hundred and a thousand Jupiter's." Ooh. It was a good one, a real good one. A confusing mix of numbers and the largest planet in our solar system?! Damn. The best I could argue for after that was a tie.
Tuesday, January 22, 2019
Friday, January 4, 2019
Stuff About Things #29
“I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.”
― Hafiz
“The truth knocks on the door and you say, ‘Go away, I'm looking for the truth,’ and so it goes away. Puzzling.”
— Robert M. Pirsig
“Look at a day when you are supremely satisfied at the end. It's not a day when you lounge around doing nothing; it's a day you've had everything to do and you've done it.”
― Margaret Thatcher
“I don't wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to work.”
― Pearl S. Buck
“It is true that I grew up in Austria without plumbing. It is true that I moved to America alone with just a gym bag. And it is true that I worked as a bricklayer and invested in some real estate to become a millionaire before I ever swung the sword in Conan the Barbarian. But it is not true that I am self-made.... To accept that mantle discounts every person and every piece of advice that got me here.... My life was built on a foundation of parents, coaches, and teachers; of kind souls who lent couches or gym back rooms where I could sleep; of mentors who shared wisdom and advice; of idols who motivated me from the pages of magazines (and, as my life grew, from personal interaction).... I have never been shy about seeking wisdom from others to pour fuel on my fire.... I've always treated the world as my classroom, soaking up lessons and stories to fuel my path forward. I hope you do the same.”
― Arnold Schwarzenegger from Tim Ferriss's Tools of Titans
“Without courage we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can't be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.”
― Maya Angelou
“A healthier future is every tiny we step we take, or every little rep.... There is no gimmick. There is no shortcut. There is no magic pill. Everyone's fitness journey will be unique, but a healthy lifestyle takes commitment, patience, and motivation.... I had to work my way back from the bottom this year, and I learned a lot along the way. After I underwent open-heart surgery this spring, I had to use a walker. I had to do breathing exercises five times a day to retain my lungs. I was frustrated and angry, and in my worst moments, I couldn't see the way back to my old self.”
― Arnold Schwarzenegger, 71 years old
“We may be in the universe as dogs and cats are in our libraries, seeing the books and hearing the conversation, but having no inkling of the meaning of it all.”
— William James
“To gain your own voice, you have to forget about being heard.”
— Allen Ginsberg
“Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree.”
— Martin Luther
“Don't play what's there, play what's not there.”
— Miles Davis
“I'm a blend of an introvert and an extrovert. There are times when I gotta have interaction with people and I get energy that way, and there are times when I need to have some quiet time to just shut the door to read, think, that kinda stuff.”
— Doug McMillon, CEO of Walmart
“We’re tight-fisted with property and money, yet think too little of wasting time, the one thing about which we should all be the toughest misers.”
— Seneca
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
— Dr. Seuss
“It is easier to act yourself into a new way of thinking, than it is to think yourself into a new way of acting.”
— Millard Fuller
“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
― Epicurus
“Work, look for peace and calm in work: you will find it nowhere else.”
— Dmitri Mendeleev
“To think is easy. To act is hard. But the hardest thing in the world is to act in accordance with your thinking.”
― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
“Happiness does not lead to gratitude. Gratitude leads to happiness.”
— Benedictine monk David Steindl-Rast
“I regard consciousness as fundamental. I regard matter as derivative from consciousness. We cannot get behind consciousness. Everything that we talk about, everything that we regard as existing, postulates consciousness.”
— Max Planck, Nobel Prize-winning physicist, father of quantum theory
― Hafiz
“The truth knocks on the door and you say, ‘Go away, I'm looking for the truth,’ and so it goes away. Puzzling.”
— Robert M. Pirsig
“Look at a day when you are supremely satisfied at the end. It's not a day when you lounge around doing nothing; it's a day you've had everything to do and you've done it.”
― Margaret Thatcher
“I don't wait for moods. You accomplish nothing if you do that. Your mind must know it has got to get down to work.”
― Pearl S. Buck
“It is true that I grew up in Austria without plumbing. It is true that I moved to America alone with just a gym bag. And it is true that I worked as a bricklayer and invested in some real estate to become a millionaire before I ever swung the sword in Conan the Barbarian. But it is not true that I am self-made.... To accept that mantle discounts every person and every piece of advice that got me here.... My life was built on a foundation of parents, coaches, and teachers; of kind souls who lent couches or gym back rooms where I could sleep; of mentors who shared wisdom and advice; of idols who motivated me from the pages of magazines (and, as my life grew, from personal interaction).... I have never been shy about seeking wisdom from others to pour fuel on my fire.... I've always treated the world as my classroom, soaking up lessons and stories to fuel my path forward. I hope you do the same.”
― Arnold Schwarzenegger from Tim Ferriss's Tools of Titans
“Without courage we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can't be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest.”
― Maya Angelou
“A healthier future is every tiny we step we take, or every little rep.... There is no gimmick. There is no shortcut. There is no magic pill. Everyone's fitness journey will be unique, but a healthy lifestyle takes commitment, patience, and motivation.... I had to work my way back from the bottom this year, and I learned a lot along the way. After I underwent open-heart surgery this spring, I had to use a walker. I had to do breathing exercises five times a day to retain my lungs. I was frustrated and angry, and in my worst moments, I couldn't see the way back to my old self.”
― Arnold Schwarzenegger, 71 years old
“We may be in the universe as dogs and cats are in our libraries, seeing the books and hearing the conversation, but having no inkling of the meaning of it all.”
— William James
“To gain your own voice, you have to forget about being heard.”
— Allen Ginsberg
“Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree.”
— Martin Luther
“Don't play what's there, play what's not there.”
— Miles Davis
“I'm a blend of an introvert and an extrovert. There are times when I gotta have interaction with people and I get energy that way, and there are times when I need to have some quiet time to just shut the door to read, think, that kinda stuff.”
— Doug McMillon, CEO of Walmart
“We’re tight-fisted with property and money, yet think too little of wasting time, the one thing about which we should all be the toughest misers.”
— Seneca
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”
— Dr. Seuss
“It is easier to act yourself into a new way of thinking, than it is to think yourself into a new way of acting.”
— Millard Fuller
“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
― Epicurus
“Work, look for peace and calm in work: you will find it nowhere else.”
— Dmitri Mendeleev
“To think is easy. To act is hard. But the hardest thing in the world is to act in accordance with your thinking.”
― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
“Happiness does not lead to gratitude. Gratitude leads to happiness.”
— Benedictine monk David Steindl-Rast
“I regard consciousness as fundamental. I regard matter as derivative from consciousness. We cannot get behind consciousness. Everything that we talk about, everything that we regard as existing, postulates consciousness.”
— Max Planck, Nobel Prize-winning physicist, father of quantum theory
Wednesday, January 2, 2019
Stuff About Things #28
“I hate how many people think 'glass half-empty' when their glass is really four-fifths full. I’m grateful when I have one drop in the glass because I know exactly what to do with it.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“There are years that ask questions and years that answer.”
— Zora Neale Hurston
“The cleverest of all, in my opinion, is the man who calls himself a fool at least once a month.”
— Dostoyevsky
“We are in control of the one asset that we all give the most fucks about, and that is time.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“It is not position but contribution that makes a leader.”
— Apoorve Dubey
“The key to life is not accumulation, it is contribution.”
— Stephen Covey
“Skills are cheap. Passion is priceless.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“For every angel-investor-funded high-tech training fortress, there's a Doug's Gym - a place unfazed by time, capital, or whatever the hell is trending on popular fitness Instagram accounts. At Doug's, you won't find any air conditioning, cardio machines, or bullshit. You will find dumbbells, barbells, and medicine balls that've been used since the Kennedy administration, when the gym's doors first opened. Of course, you'll also find Doug. Eighty-five years old and healthy as a horse, he's encouraging guys a quarter of his age as he cranks through total-body lifts like push presses, squats, and lunges with a 50-pound dumbbell in each hand. Doug himself is the real promise, reminding all who come that getting and staying fit isn't so much about what you're doing or the fancy gym you're doing it in. The important thing is that you're doing something - hard - a few days a week, every week, in a place that just feels right."
— Men's Health
“You could fill the Staples Center with the amount of acting jobs I've wanted and lost over the years."
— Ryan Reynolds
“In order to be happy, you have to be willing to be disliked. In order to respect yourself, you have to be unafraid to disappoint others. You have to make tough decisions.... The people who have made the greatest impressions on me in my life take care of themselves and don't always look for the most pleasing answer in any given moment. Happiness, like so many things, is a choice. I know this only because I've worked with and spent time with so many people who don't choose it.”
— Ryan Reynolds
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”
— Marilyn Monroe
“Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.”
— Kyle Chandler
“I want to feel my life while I'm in it.”
— Meryl Streep
“When I dare to be powerful – to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.”
— Audre Lorde
“I like criticism. It makes you strong.”
— Lebron James
“Little by little, one travels far.”
— J.R.R. Tolkien
“Time is how you spend your love.”
— Zadie Smith
“What matters in life is not what happens to you but what you remember and how you remember it.”
— Gabriel Garcia Marquez
“It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.”
— Gabriel Garcia Marquez
“The more relaxed you are, the better you are at everything: the better you are with your loved ones, the better you are with your enemies, the better you are at your job, the better you are with yourself.”
— Bill Murray
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“There are years that ask questions and years that answer.”
— Zora Neale Hurston
“The cleverest of all, in my opinion, is the man who calls himself a fool at least once a month.”
— Dostoyevsky
“We are in control of the one asset that we all give the most fucks about, and that is time.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“It is not position but contribution that makes a leader.”
— Apoorve Dubey
“The key to life is not accumulation, it is contribution.”
— Stephen Covey
“Skills are cheap. Passion is priceless.”
— Gary Vaynerchuk
“For every angel-investor-funded high-tech training fortress, there's a Doug's Gym - a place unfazed by time, capital, or whatever the hell is trending on popular fitness Instagram accounts. At Doug's, you won't find any air conditioning, cardio machines, or bullshit. You will find dumbbells, barbells, and medicine balls that've been used since the Kennedy administration, when the gym's doors first opened. Of course, you'll also find Doug. Eighty-five years old and healthy as a horse, he's encouraging guys a quarter of his age as he cranks through total-body lifts like push presses, squats, and lunges with a 50-pound dumbbell in each hand. Doug himself is the real promise, reminding all who come that getting and staying fit isn't so much about what you're doing or the fancy gym you're doing it in. The important thing is that you're doing something - hard - a few days a week, every week, in a place that just feels right."
— Men's Health
“You could fill the Staples Center with the amount of acting jobs I've wanted and lost over the years."
— Ryan Reynolds
“In order to be happy, you have to be willing to be disliked. In order to respect yourself, you have to be unafraid to disappoint others. You have to make tough decisions.... The people who have made the greatest impressions on me in my life take care of themselves and don't always look for the most pleasing answer in any given moment. Happiness, like so many things, is a choice. I know this only because I've worked with and spent time with so many people who don't choose it.”
— Ryan Reynolds
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”
— Marilyn Monroe
“Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.”
— Kyle Chandler
“I want to feel my life while I'm in it.”
— Meryl Streep
“When I dare to be powerful – to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.”
— Audre Lorde
“I like criticism. It makes you strong.”
— Lebron James
“Little by little, one travels far.”
— J.R.R. Tolkien
“Time is how you spend your love.”
— Zadie Smith
“What matters in life is not what happens to you but what you remember and how you remember it.”
— Gabriel Garcia Marquez
“It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.”
— Gabriel Garcia Marquez
“The more relaxed you are, the better you are at everything: the better you are with your loved ones, the better you are with your enemies, the better you are at your job, the better you are with yourself.”
— Bill Murray
Sunday, September 9, 2018
#400
For the big #400, I thought I'd put into words how much I love M 'n' m. I'm grateful. We're all grateful for certain people in our lives. They're gifts. Life itself is a gift, it seems to me, despite it's challenges, which can be merciless, but life actualizes as a gift, independent of its highs and lows, precisely when we love. That's it. When we love. That's my opinion anyway. Being loved back is swell too, but out of our control. There's something suspicious, however, about the circular or reciprocal nature of most genuine love. But the world gets ugly sometimes. I know that, and so do you. I promised to describe how much I love M 'n' m and, well, I can't, no surprise, but neither, perfectly, can Fitzgerald or Melville, or the Irish or Russian masters, or the poets, Shakespeare, Homer, Rumi, Rilke. I think this chase is why they kept writing and writing and thank God they did; they weren't lousy like some of us. My favorite contemporary writers – Michael Chabon, Mark Helprin, Maria Popova, to name a few – aren't lousy either. They're brilliant and inventive describers of things, but otherwise a lot like the rest of us. Capturing a thing in words and phrases is hard. It's analogous to the difficulty of hitting a baseball to me, and pitching a baseball, because there are so many variables, moving parts, choices, and outcomes, for the pitcher and the batter both, as for the writer and reader both. But we can tell when it goes well and when it doesn't. I think of Twain's saying: "The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter – it's the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning."
I love M 'n' m and I'm very grateful for them.
I love M 'n' m and I'm very grateful for them.
Retro M 'n' m – 2008 – #4
February 2008
Megan is so sweet. If she drops something, she says, "Sowwy, Dad," and if I drop something, she says, "It's okay, Dad." She's in a sweet-spot of cuteness right now, just a few feet tall and putting sentences together in her adorable voice. Of course, sometimes she says, "Go away, Daddy" and that's not nice.
Michael doesn't like to have his toenails trimmed. Today, he said, "Trimming is ridiculous. Trimming is NOT part of this world!" We all cope in different ways.
The other day, Michael was drawing on his whiteboard and told me, "Daddy, I'm drawing Jupiter's moon. It has a lot of volcanoes on it." Interesting, I didn't know that. To date, around 700 species of dinosaurs have been named. I'm pretty sure Michael can spout facts about most of them, and pronounce them too, which is no small feat since many have names like Pachycephalasaurus, Deinonychus, Sinosauropteryx, and so on.
March 2008
The house is empty. No kids. The difference, of course, is striking. Less noise, fewer dishes, no diapers, no schedule, no bathes and bedtimes, no kid shows, no Lego-playing, we eat whenever we want, we come and go as we please. It's a freedom I can't believe I ever possessed before in this lifetime, before M 'n' m.
At the Sea Life Minnesota Aquarium at the Mall of America, Alissa – my sweet little niece, although she's bigger than Ellie, my other sweet little niece – asked me to read a sign to her. So I read aloud, "There are less than 100 shark attacks worldwide each year, and only 10 of those are fatal." I should've ad-libbed or omitted or substituted something more cheery at the end, because Alissa asked, "What does 'fatal' mean?" I said, "Oh, um, that just means they got hurt a little worse than the others."
I was talking with Michael and used the word 'intense.' I was probably reacting to a dinosaur story-fact he was sharing with me. He asked, "What does 'intense' mean?" I told him, "Very serious." He said, "Well, what does 'serious' mean?" And so it goes. I love it. I'm happy he keeps asking; I'm happy he wants to learn, especially about words. I'd say words are pretty important. I love words. I love Michael.
I wish Michael didn't, like, become physically ill every time we make him share toys with Megan. When Michael was a toddler at the hospital with newly born Megan, and everyone was fawning over her, I'll never forget Michael asking us to 'put her away,' and then, when it was time to bring her home, politely asking if we could leave her at the hospital.
Today Megan wiped at her nose several times and declared, "I got da booga, Daddy, I got da booga!" She was excited, and I know the feeling; clear nasal passages are paramount to refreshing, deep breaths, and it's with similar pride, urgency, and disregard for propriety that I undertake to clear my own nasal passages. Of course, Megan didn't have a Kleenex. So her booger is probably a crispy critter stuck to our couch now.
April 2008
I'm not sure how I feel about Meggie's haircut. I think at the heart of my reflection is a simple question: Can you add to, or subtract from... perfection? No, you can't.
Papa Mike, Josiah, Greg, and I went to a Cubs game. Michael wanted badly to join us, but a Cubs game with those three isn't as kid-friendly as it is beer-friendly, bar-friendly, and so on. There is no slowing down Papa Mike. Or Greg. Or Josiah. I like hanging out with Joe (aka Josiah); he's a former college football player and bouncer who can bench 500 lbs, also a former UFC fighter and training partner in the Miletich Camp. Did I mention that Joe is Megan's Godfather?
Megan is so sweet. If she drops something, she says, "Sowwy, Dad," and if I drop something, she says, "It's okay, Dad." She's in a sweet-spot of cuteness right now, just a few feet tall and putting sentences together in her adorable voice. Of course, sometimes she says, "Go away, Daddy" and that's not nice.
Michael doesn't like to have his toenails trimmed. Today, he said, "Trimming is ridiculous. Trimming is NOT part of this world!" We all cope in different ways.
The other day, Michael was drawing on his whiteboard and told me, "Daddy, I'm drawing Jupiter's moon. It has a lot of volcanoes on it." Interesting, I didn't know that. To date, around 700 species of dinosaurs have been named. I'm pretty sure Michael can spout facts about most of them, and pronounce them too, which is no small feat since many have names like Pachycephalasaurus, Deinonychus, Sinosauropteryx, and so on.
March 2008
The house is empty. No kids. The difference, of course, is striking. Less noise, fewer dishes, no diapers, no schedule, no bathes and bedtimes, no kid shows, no Lego-playing, we eat whenever we want, we come and go as we please. It's a freedom I can't believe I ever possessed before in this lifetime, before M 'n' m.
At the Sea Life Minnesota Aquarium at the Mall of America, Alissa – my sweet little niece, although she's bigger than Ellie, my other sweet little niece – asked me to read a sign to her. So I read aloud, "There are less than 100 shark attacks worldwide each year, and only 10 of those are fatal." I should've ad-libbed or omitted or substituted something more cheery at the end, because Alissa asked, "What does 'fatal' mean?" I said, "Oh, um, that just means they got hurt a little worse than the others."
I was talking with Michael and used the word 'intense.' I was probably reacting to a dinosaur story-fact he was sharing with me. He asked, "What does 'intense' mean?" I told him, "Very serious." He said, "Well, what does 'serious' mean?" And so it goes. I love it. I'm happy he keeps asking; I'm happy he wants to learn, especially about words. I'd say words are pretty important. I love words. I love Michael.
I wish Michael didn't, like, become physically ill every time we make him share toys with Megan. When Michael was a toddler at the hospital with newly born Megan, and everyone was fawning over her, I'll never forget Michael asking us to 'put her away,' and then, when it was time to bring her home, politely asking if we could leave her at the hospital.
Today Megan wiped at her nose several times and declared, "I got da booga, Daddy, I got da booga!" She was excited, and I know the feeling; clear nasal passages are paramount to refreshing, deep breaths, and it's with similar pride, urgency, and disregard for propriety that I undertake to clear my own nasal passages. Of course, Megan didn't have a Kleenex. So her booger is probably a crispy critter stuck to our couch now.
April 2008
I'm not sure how I feel about Meggie's haircut. I think at the heart of my reflection is a simple question: Can you add to, or subtract from... perfection? No, you can't.
Papa Mike, Josiah, Greg, and I went to a Cubs game. Michael wanted badly to join us, but a Cubs game with those three isn't as kid-friendly as it is beer-friendly, bar-friendly, and so on. There is no slowing down Papa Mike. Or Greg. Or Josiah. I like hanging out with Joe (aka Josiah); he's a former college football player and bouncer who can bench 500 lbs, also a former UFC fighter and training partner in the Miletich Camp. Did I mention that Joe is Megan's Godfather?
Wednesday, September 5, 2018
If you're a dad, what the world looks like for your little 'kitten,' and what to do about it...
"My dad was such a great dad, he was really engaged, but he was a single father, and relatively young… but he just encouraged me to be aggressive. It’s very hard for single parents, period, and I think it’s very hard for fathers and daughters, because, I just think if you’re a dad the world looks like, you know, a field of broken glass and potholes and molten lava, and you’ve got this little kitten and you’re so terrified to put the kitten down, so either they grip very tightly, or, in my father’s case, they throw you up in the air, and expect they’ve given you the skills to land, and that was definitely his strategy."
— Aisha Tyler
— Aisha Tyler
Monday, August 27, 2018
Stuff About Things #27
"If people knew how hard I worked to achieve my mastery, it wouldn't seem so wonderful after all."
— Michelangelo
"Success at anything will always come down to this: focus and effort, and we control both."
— Dwayne Johnson
"Doubt kills more dreams that failure ever will."
— Suzy Kassem
"The difference between a pebble and a mountain lies in whom you ask to move it."
— Marcus Buckingham
"Be at war with your vices."
— Ben Franklin
"Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body."
— Seneca
"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.... Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them.... People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision.... Learn to say 'no' to the good so you can say 'yes' to the best.... A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit."
— John C. Maxwell
"It occurred to Yancy that, in the time they'd known each other, he hadn't once seen her look at her cell phone. She never texted, tweeted, Facebooked, Instagrammed, or posted a single picture when they were together. He found this behavior alluring."
— Razor Girl by Carl Hiaasen
"Connectivity is one of the great blessings of the internet era, and it makes extraordinary things possible. But constant connectivity can be a curse, encouraging the lesser angels of our nature. None of the nine Muses of classical times bore the names Impatience or Distraction."
— Will Schwalbe
"Simple can understand complicated but complicated cannot understand simple."
— Shambhala Buddhist saying
"Truth is ever to be found in simplicity, and not in the multiplicity and confusion of things."
― Isaac Newton
"Clothing is a language, a visual language. And it's one you can learn and develop and use to express yourself ."
— Mark Cho
"Stress, anxiety, and depression are caused when we are living to please others."
— Paulo Coelho
"Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted."
— Aldous Huxley
"Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude... nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude."
— Thomas Jefferson
"The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers."
— Thomas Jefferson
"All our previous positions are now exposed as absurd. But people don't draw the obvious conclusion..."
— Terence McKenna
"Everything we call real is made of things that cannot be regarded as real."
— Niels Bohr, physicist
"What was once called the objective world is a sort of Rorschach inkblot, into which each culture, each system of science and religion, each type of personality, reads a meaning only remotely derived from the shape and color of the blot itself."
— Lewis Mumford
"Nature does not know extinction; all it knows is transformation. Everything science has taught me, and continues to teach me, strengthens my belief in the continuity of our spiritual existence after death."
— Wernher von Braun
"Men are born soft and supple; dead they are stiff and hard. Plants are born tender and pliant; dead they brittle and dry. Thus whoever is stiff and inflexible is a disciple of death. Whoever is soft and yielding is a disciple of life. The hard and stiff will be broken. The soft and supple will prevail."
— Lao Tzu
"The amount of revenue lost (by the TV and film industry) to piracy has skyrocketed from US$6.7 billion in 2010 to nearly US$31.8 billion in 2016. The figure will hit nearly US$52 billion in 2022. These stats do not include sports or pay TV, making the numbers all the more shocking."
— Digital TV Research Ltd
"Kim Libreri, who spent years in the film industry working on special effects... predicts that by 2022 graphics will be so advanced that they will be indistinguishable from reality." (This is not good news for Hollywood and movie stars.)
— Vanity Fair magazine
"I read everything. I read my way out of the two libraries in Harlem by the time I was thirteen. One does learn a great deal about writing this way. First of all, you learn how little you know. It is true that the more one learns the less one knows. I’m still learning how to write. I don’t know what technique is. All I know is that you have to make the reader see it. This I learned from Dostoyevsky, from Balzac."
— James Baldwin
"I hope we're not that soft. I hope we can hear comments or read comments and not get offended by things. It's a professional environment; it's not a personal environment. The things I'm saying, I don't have some vendetta against any player. I care about winning, No. 1, and I'm going to say and do the things that I feel like can advance us. It's going to be tough at some points. It's not a popularity contest all the time. Obviously, as a human, you like being liked and appreciated, but I'm trying to win games because that's my job. Again, I don't feel like when you make a statement like that (criticizing the team's effort in practice) that there needs to be some big response or feelings hurt or offense that somebody takes with it. If they do, they're taking it the wrong way because this is a professional environment. Like I said, I'm doing things that I feel like are in the best interest of the team from a leadership standpoint, and if no one else is going to stand up and criticize a bad practice, then maybe I need to be the one to do it. So I did it.... You get to this league, and to stick around, you've got to be self-motivated. So as a leader, you try to inspire, but the motivation to change and to improve has got to come from within."
— Aaron Rodgers
"Identify issues and beliefs (about yourself) and self-talk make a big difference. A lot of people believe they just can't do certain things, like remember names. A lot of people say, 'Oh, I have a bad memory.' Right? They're always like 'I have memory' or 'I have focus' or 'I don't have focus' or 'I have creativity' or 'I don't have creativity.' I want you to scrap that. Creativity is not something you have, it's something you do. Focus is not something you have, focus is something you do, energy is not something you have or don't have, it's something you do. Memory is not something you have, it's something you do. And what's the benefit of turning it into a do, as opposed to something you have? You have control over it, because you can put it into a process. It becomes a strategy. Because there's a strategy for remembering names. There's a strategy for having focus. It's a verb, not a noun."
— Jim Kwik
"Love is a verb.... Love is not a feeling, it is behavior, it is how a person acts..."
— Oprah
"Nobody loves free stuff more than rich people."
— Crazy Rich Asians
— Michelangelo
"Success at anything will always come down to this: focus and effort, and we control both."
— Dwayne Johnson
"Doubt kills more dreams that failure ever will."
— Suzy Kassem
"The difference between a pebble and a mountain lies in whom you ask to move it."
— Marcus Buckingham
"Be at war with your vices."
— Ben Franklin
"Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body."
— Seneca
"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.... Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them.... People buy into the leader before they buy into the vision.... Learn to say 'no' to the good so you can say 'yes' to the best.... A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit."
— John C. Maxwell
"It occurred to Yancy that, in the time they'd known each other, he hadn't once seen her look at her cell phone. She never texted, tweeted, Facebooked, Instagrammed, or posted a single picture when they were together. He found this behavior alluring."
— Razor Girl by Carl Hiaasen
"Connectivity is one of the great blessings of the internet era, and it makes extraordinary things possible. But constant connectivity can be a curse, encouraging the lesser angels of our nature. None of the nine Muses of classical times bore the names Impatience or Distraction."
— Will Schwalbe
"Simple can understand complicated but complicated cannot understand simple."
— Shambhala Buddhist saying
"Truth is ever to be found in simplicity, and not in the multiplicity and confusion of things."
― Isaac Newton
"Clothing is a language, a visual language. And it's one you can learn and develop and use to express yourself ."
— Mark Cho
"Stress, anxiety, and depression are caused when we are living to please others."
— Paulo Coelho
"Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted."
— Aldous Huxley
"Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude... nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude."
— Thomas Jefferson
"The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers."
— Thomas Jefferson
"All our previous positions are now exposed as absurd. But people don't draw the obvious conclusion..."
— Terence McKenna
"Everything we call real is made of things that cannot be regarded as real."
— Niels Bohr, physicist
"What was once called the objective world is a sort of Rorschach inkblot, into which each culture, each system of science and religion, each type of personality, reads a meaning only remotely derived from the shape and color of the blot itself."
— Lewis Mumford
"Nature does not know extinction; all it knows is transformation. Everything science has taught me, and continues to teach me, strengthens my belief in the continuity of our spiritual existence after death."
— Wernher von Braun
"Men are born soft and supple; dead they are stiff and hard. Plants are born tender and pliant; dead they brittle and dry. Thus whoever is stiff and inflexible is a disciple of death. Whoever is soft and yielding is a disciple of life. The hard and stiff will be broken. The soft and supple will prevail."
— Lao Tzu
"The amount of revenue lost (by the TV and film industry) to piracy has skyrocketed from US$6.7 billion in 2010 to nearly US$31.8 billion in 2016. The figure will hit nearly US$52 billion in 2022. These stats do not include sports or pay TV, making the numbers all the more shocking."
— Digital TV Research Ltd
"Kim Libreri, who spent years in the film industry working on special effects... predicts that by 2022 graphics will be so advanced that they will be indistinguishable from reality." (This is not good news for Hollywood and movie stars.)
— Vanity Fair magazine
"I read everything. I read my way out of the two libraries in Harlem by the time I was thirteen. One does learn a great deal about writing this way. First of all, you learn how little you know. It is true that the more one learns the less one knows. I’m still learning how to write. I don’t know what technique is. All I know is that you have to make the reader see it. This I learned from Dostoyevsky, from Balzac."
— James Baldwin
"I hope we're not that soft. I hope we can hear comments or read comments and not get offended by things. It's a professional environment; it's not a personal environment. The things I'm saying, I don't have some vendetta against any player. I care about winning, No. 1, and I'm going to say and do the things that I feel like can advance us. It's going to be tough at some points. It's not a popularity contest all the time. Obviously, as a human, you like being liked and appreciated, but I'm trying to win games because that's my job. Again, I don't feel like when you make a statement like that (criticizing the team's effort in practice) that there needs to be some big response or feelings hurt or offense that somebody takes with it. If they do, they're taking it the wrong way because this is a professional environment. Like I said, I'm doing things that I feel like are in the best interest of the team from a leadership standpoint, and if no one else is going to stand up and criticize a bad practice, then maybe I need to be the one to do it. So I did it.... You get to this league, and to stick around, you've got to be self-motivated. So as a leader, you try to inspire, but the motivation to change and to improve has got to come from within."
— Aaron Rodgers
"Identify issues and beliefs (about yourself) and self-talk make a big difference. A lot of people believe they just can't do certain things, like remember names. A lot of people say, 'Oh, I have a bad memory.' Right? They're always like 'I have memory' or 'I have focus' or 'I don't have focus' or 'I have creativity' or 'I don't have creativity.' I want you to scrap that. Creativity is not something you have, it's something you do. Focus is not something you have, focus is something you do, energy is not something you have or don't have, it's something you do. Memory is not something you have, it's something you do. And what's the benefit of turning it into a do, as opposed to something you have? You have control over it, because you can put it into a process. It becomes a strategy. Because there's a strategy for remembering names. There's a strategy for having focus. It's a verb, not a noun."
— Jim Kwik
"Love is a verb.... Love is not a feeling, it is behavior, it is how a person acts..."
— Oprah
"Nobody loves free stuff more than rich people."
— Crazy Rich Asians
Thursday, August 16, 2018
On Motherhood
"It’s hard to describe the joy of motherhood. It isn’t as easily Instagrammable as a life (without kids) of endless holidays, blue skies, cocktails and local pastries on cobbled streets in faraway lands, so it doesn’t necessarily register in surveys or even in casual conversation. It isn’t a joy that’s as easily shared with the world or on social media. In restaurants when my daughter, in her high chair with her two and a half teeth, scrunches up her face, I look around to see if everyone has noticed and been charmed. Nobody has (except for the occasional old lady) and I get annoyed, even though I myself constantly ignore all other babies in my vicinity. The joy and fun of motherhood are so deeply personal, so intimate and so selfish, there’s no way to explain it to the world, particularly our current social media heavy world. Jennifer Senior, author of All Joy and No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood, says in an interview that the 'feeling when your kid laughs or when your kid says something that’s so totally, like, amazingly weird, or insightful, or sensitive – it’s not the same as like getting a good laugh out of watching a movie or having a really nice time with a friend. It’s just like a different category of experience.' It is a different category – one that can’t compare to your life before you had the child because no point of reference is the same after you’ve had the child."
— Diksha Basu, from her article Rebranding Motherhood in The New York Times
— Diksha Basu, from her article Rebranding Motherhood in The New York Times
On Attitude
When I was a kid, I remember being overly-competitive about certain things, and also bent to the negative; a little misfortune, during any contest, immediately convinced me that my team, my score, my effort, my mission was doomed. I worried and fretted. I pouted. I gave up. My attitude sucked. (Not always! but sometimes.) A loss at a board game was devastating. Not winning the most trivial, skill-less competition could ruin my day. Eventually, I learned the wisdom below. Attitude dictates mood, mindset, energy, personality, perspective, everything. Figuratively, it's an ever-present lens in life; we see everything through it. It's the loudest garment we wear; it's a sign around our necks. It's the horse we're riding whether we realize it or not. It's not a reaction to some game, it is the game. Okay, my metaphors are silly but my point – for M 'n' m – is not: attitude is powerful. Around M 'n' m, I try to be positive, grateful, optimistic, energetic. Of course, it's not easy; I've whined and limped and dragged myself through many-a-day, but M 'n' m know it's what I strive for, it's how I try to live life, and it's what I wish for them: when it comes to attitude, try not to suck!
"Attitude is everything." ... "Life is an attitude, have a good one." ... "A bad attitude is like a flat tire, if you don't change it, you won't go very far."
"The greatest day in your life and mine is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly grow up."
— John C. Maxwell
"Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens."
— Khalil Gibran
"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes."
— William James
"The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances."
—Victor E. Frankl
"People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude."
— John C. Maxwell
"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."
— Albert Einstein
"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.... The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitude."
— Charles R. Swindoll
"Live life as if everything is rigged in your favor."
— Rumi
"If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?"
— Rumi
"Attitude is everything." ... "Life is an attitude, have a good one." ... "A bad attitude is like a flat tire, if you don't change it, you won't go very far."
"The greatest day in your life and mine is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly grow up."
— John C. Maxwell
"Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens."
— Khalil Gibran
"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes."
— William James
"The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances."
—Victor E. Frankl
"People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude."
— John C. Maxwell
"Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character."
— Albert Einstein
"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.... The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitude."
— Charles R. Swindoll
"Live life as if everything is rigged in your favor."
— Rumi
"If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?"
— Rumi
Monday, August 6, 2018
Stuff About Things #26
"The question is not what a man can scorn, or disparage, or find fault with, but what he can love, and value, and appreciate."
— John Ruskin
"I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving."
— Oliver Wendell Holmes
"Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.... We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.... The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.... Youth is wasted on the young.... I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.... People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.... A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."
— George Bernard Shaw
"May you live all the days of your life."
— Jonathan Swift
"When a true genius appears in this world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.... It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into.... Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody's face but their own."
— Jonathan Swift
"The corporate system is set up to favor those with steel elbows."
— Elena Herdieckerhoff
"You're on earth. There's no cure for that."
— Samuel Beckett
"I have no yesterdays, time took them away; tomorrow may not be, but I have today."
— Pearl Yeadon McGinnis
"I have four things to learn in life: to think clearly without hurry or confusion; to love everybody sincerely; to act in everything with the highest motives; to trust in God unhesitatingly."
— Helen Keller
"I said, 'Joe, how does it make you feel to know that our host only yesterday may have made more money than your novel Catch-22 has earned in its entire history?' And Joe said, 'I’ve got something he'll never have.' And I said, 'What on earth could that be, Joe?' And Joe said, “Enough.'"
"I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.... True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.... A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved.... Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward."
"Every writer I know has trouble writing."
— Joseph Heller
"Humans will always choose what they understand over what they do not."
— Dr. Robert Ford, fictional character in Westworld
"School's a piece of cake compared to life, man."
— Papa Mike
"We need dark in order to show light."
— Bob Ross, painter, creator of The Joy of Painting
"Of course I'm not Shakespeare or Hegel; but I have written works that I've polished as carefully as I could, and some have been failures, surely, but others less so, while still others have been successes. And that's enough."
— Jean-Paul Sartre
"Sartre had taught me to think in the present as if yesterday's thoughts did not count: they would come back if they were still needed."
— Benny Levy
"(Joaquin Phoenix and I) were talking on the first day about the fact I had never done a serious scene in a movie, and he asked, 'Well, are you nervous?' I said, 'Yeah, I don't know what I'm doing!' And he said, 'Do you think that any of us ever know what we're doing?' He may have just been saying that to make me feel better, but if he was saying it in earnest, it's kind of a clue as to why he's so good. If someone really is approaching their work as though it's the first time they've ever done it, then that is an incredible sort of openness and lack of complacency. It's such an alive place to be working from."
— Joanna Newsom
"Everybody treats me like an old man. I laugh about it. Why? Because an old man never feels like an old man. The attitude of other people makes me understand what old age means to the person who looks at it from outside, but I don't feel my old age. So to be old doesn't in itself teach my anything. What does teach me something is the attitude of other people toward me. In other words, the fact that for others I am old is to be profoundly old. Old age is a reality that is mine but that others feel..."
— Jean-Paul Sartre, 1980 (so he was 75 years old)
"The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm."
— Aldous Huxley
"Then (my father) told my sister Mary and me that he was going to prepare us to fight the battle of life by giving us an education, which he and our mother had not had."
— Anson Mills
"My family shaped me almost entirely. I'm my mother's son, and she had a vision of what I should be capable of. She provided the means to nurture whatever it was that would become my actualized self. My grandfather was the closest thing I had to a father growing up; he was enormously inspirational. He is in some ways a small-town, country-days man - a touch-stone of masculinity and humor and selflessness. He was all man to me. There was a deeper level of discovery that came the moment my son's head crowned at birth. My children have taught me as much as I've tried to teach them. My daughter, particularly, has taught me a new level of appreciation for what it is to be female, what it is to be a woman, and about my relationship to femininity and women."
— Jeffrey Wright, actor
"Each person has something he can do easily and can't imagine why everybody else has so much trouble doing it."
— Kurt Vonnegut
"... it is sometimes wise courageously to defy and disobey injurious and useless commands. Such actions often injure the reputation of the reformer for a time, but eventually they will distinguish him above the larger number of his fellows..."
— Anson Mills
"Few things break us out of our routines and awaken us to the living substance of happiness more powerfully than travel."
— Maria Popova
— John Ruskin
"I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving."
— Oliver Wendell Holmes
"Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.... We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.... The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.... Youth is wasted on the young.... I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.... People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.... A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."
— George Bernard Shaw
"May you live all the days of your life."
— Jonathan Swift
"When a true genius appears in this world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.... It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into.... Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody's face but their own."
— Jonathan Swift
"The corporate system is set up to favor those with steel elbows."
— Elena Herdieckerhoff
"You're on earth. There's no cure for that."
— Samuel Beckett
"I have no yesterdays, time took them away; tomorrow may not be, but I have today."
— Pearl Yeadon McGinnis
"I have four things to learn in life: to think clearly without hurry or confusion; to love everybody sincerely; to act in everything with the highest motives; to trust in God unhesitatingly."
— Helen Keller
"I said, 'Joe, how does it make you feel to know that our host only yesterday may have made more money than your novel Catch-22 has earned in its entire history?' And Joe said, 'I’ve got something he'll never have.' And I said, 'What on earth could that be, Joe?' And Joe said, “Enough.'"
— Kurt Vonnegut, recalling a conversation he had with Joseph Heller at a party hosted by a billionaire
— Kurt Vonnegut
— Joseph Heller
"Humans will always choose what they understand over what they do not."
— Dr. Robert Ford, fictional character in Westworld
"School's a piece of cake compared to life, man."
— Papa Mike
"We need dark in order to show light."
— Bob Ross, painter, creator of The Joy of Painting
"Of course I'm not Shakespeare or Hegel; but I have written works that I've polished as carefully as I could, and some have been failures, surely, but others less so, while still others have been successes. And that's enough."
— Jean-Paul Sartre
"Sartre had taught me to think in the present as if yesterday's thoughts did not count: they would come back if they were still needed."
— Benny Levy
"(Joaquin Phoenix and I) were talking on the first day about the fact I had never done a serious scene in a movie, and he asked, 'Well, are you nervous?' I said, 'Yeah, I don't know what I'm doing!' And he said, 'Do you think that any of us ever know what we're doing?' He may have just been saying that to make me feel better, but if he was saying it in earnest, it's kind of a clue as to why he's so good. If someone really is approaching their work as though it's the first time they've ever done it, then that is an incredible sort of openness and lack of complacency. It's such an alive place to be working from."
— Joanna Newsom
"Everybody treats me like an old man. I laugh about it. Why? Because an old man never feels like an old man. The attitude of other people makes me understand what old age means to the person who looks at it from outside, but I don't feel my old age. So to be old doesn't in itself teach my anything. What does teach me something is the attitude of other people toward me. In other words, the fact that for others I am old is to be profoundly old. Old age is a reality that is mine but that others feel..."
— Jean-Paul Sartre, 1980 (so he was 75 years old)
"The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm."
— Aldous Huxley
"Then (my father) told my sister Mary and me that he was going to prepare us to fight the battle of life by giving us an education, which he and our mother had not had."
— Anson Mills
"My family shaped me almost entirely. I'm my mother's son, and she had a vision of what I should be capable of. She provided the means to nurture whatever it was that would become my actualized self. My grandfather was the closest thing I had to a father growing up; he was enormously inspirational. He is in some ways a small-town, country-days man - a touch-stone of masculinity and humor and selflessness. He was all man to me. There was a deeper level of discovery that came the moment my son's head crowned at birth. My children have taught me as much as I've tried to teach them. My daughter, particularly, has taught me a new level of appreciation for what it is to be female, what it is to be a woman, and about my relationship to femininity and women."
— Jeffrey Wright, actor
"Each person has something he can do easily and can't imagine why everybody else has so much trouble doing it."
— Kurt Vonnegut
"... it is sometimes wise courageously to defy and disobey injurious and useless commands. Such actions often injure the reputation of the reformer for a time, but eventually they will distinguish him above the larger number of his fellows..."
— Anson Mills
"Few things break us out of our routines and awaken us to the living substance of happiness more powerfully than travel."
— Maria Popova
Wednesday, August 1, 2018
Tiger Woods may be a lot of things...
... but two of them I can relate to, at least a little: he's my age and he's a father. Last week, he said this about his two kids – a daughter and a son – being with him during his final round at the British Open:
"In team sports you can hide, in individual sports you cannot. You're exposed. They saw their dad get into contention and end up leading the tournament. Then end up losing the tournament. But I tried until the very end. They saw me make that birdie on the par 5, and they saw I stuffed that shot on 18 even though that yahoo was yelling at me on the tee shot. They saw how much I was grinding. They said, 'Well, you weren't going to win.' I said, 'I know I wasn't going to win, but that doesn't stop me from grinding.' That is a teachable moment because they were there in the present, in person. Sometimes you can't always see that on TV."
Tuesday, July 31, 2018
Sunday, July 29, 2018
"You feel a love...
... you know you will never be able to adequately explain or express to (your son), a love that flows one way, down the generations, not in reverse, and is understood and reciprocated only when time has made of a younger generation an older one."
— Mohsin Hamid, How to Get Filthy Rich in Rising Asia: A Novel
— Mohsin Hamid, How to Get Filthy Rich in Rising Asia: A Novel
Wednesday, July 11, 2018
#399
My mission to reach 400 has stalled. 398 was two months ago. Speaking of two: I'll have two teenagers soon. My little kids aren't little anymore. It's bittersweet; I can't wait to know the adult versions of M 'n' m, but their years as children have been a trip; I've enjoyed it and I'm grateful and not ready for it to shrink in the distance as we race into the future.
I have some old notes and scribbles here that I never shared. Perhaps it's because many are not directly about M 'n' m, and others are controversial (so best unshared), or so brief I must've intended to fatten them up by rambling, which is never good because good writing is lean. My writing isn't lean or good. Here are some notes:
I think confidence and humility can coexist beautifully. And I think that's called grace. It is a special kind of polish, or refinement. I wish I saw this in the mirror. I wish I saw it in the world more, too.
It is silly, of course, but there's wisdom in it, for us all to consider, when judging ourselves or anyone else, the tongue-in-cheek advice, "Pick your parents well."
In a Puerto Rican shop today in Old San Juan, I saw this on a bracelet: "Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
I’ve only ever looked out of one pair of eyes. And I’ve only been inside of one head, one mind. (My own, of course.) Over seven billion people on the planet now. And how many before us? And only this single experience as pilot of a human mind and body? Yet life affords you another kind of perspective-changer: Being young and getting older. That is meaningful change. And, if we're lucky I guess, we keep getting older and older.
I have some old notes and scribbles here that I never shared. Perhaps it's because many are not directly about M 'n' m, and others are controversial (so best unshared), or so brief I must've intended to fatten them up by rambling, which is never good because good writing is lean. My writing isn't lean or good. Here are some notes:
I think confidence and humility can coexist beautifully. And I think that's called grace. It is a special kind of polish, or refinement. I wish I saw this in the mirror. I wish I saw it in the world more, too.
It is silly, of course, but there's wisdom in it, for us all to consider, when judging ourselves or anyone else, the tongue-in-cheek advice, "Pick your parents well."
I am finally reading "A Picture of Dorian
Gray." The story of Oscar Wilde is kind of a tragic one, but I can only
agree, so far (I am on page 9), that he is one of the best ever to turn a phrase. I really loved the Dublin Writer's Museum which Jeanette suggested we visit in Ireland. It houses some artifacts and original writings, letters, manuscripts, etc. from Wilde, Joyce, Swift, Shaw, Stoker, Yeats, Behan, Beckett. Geniuses, every one.
In a Puerto Rican shop today in Old San Juan, I saw this on a bracelet: "Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
I’ve only ever looked out of one pair of eyes. And I’ve only been inside of one head, one mind. (My own, of course.) Over seven billion people on the planet now. And how many before us? And only this single experience as pilot of a human mind and body? Yet life affords you another kind of perspective-changer: Being young and getting older. That is meaningful change. And, if we're lucky I guess, we keep getting older and older.
Megan asked me, "What's for breakfast?" I said, "Eggs."
She said, "Every time I see eggs, I think of baby chickens. I wanna put
eggs under heat lamps." Oh brother.
Do you ever give credence to the possibility that we reincarnate, that we've had past lives? And what if, when we were 'someone else,' we touched the lives of those who touch our lives now? What if we lived alongside our ancestors somehow, in some way? In mines or factories or foxholes with our grandfathers? What if you were the old doctor who saved your grandma's life when she was young? What if this, what if that... would you carry yourself differently? Do you want to carry yourself differently? Maybe we should ask ourselves questions like these and realize what we can't be sure of. Which, it seems to me, is another way of saying: realize what is possible.
Fundamentalists scare the shit out of me. And not just the jihadi and sharia variety. Some of my evangelical Christian friends I find uncomfortably myopic, rigid, and condemnatory. (For the record, I'm Christian, although, perfect example: certain Christians would say I'm not because my views are too liberal or flexible or inclusive or modern; and I respect, and often praise, other world religions.) I think the litmus test is simple: If someone is drowning, we shouldn't, of course, throw them a barbell, but neither should we even hesitate or put conditions on our help in that moment. Right? I feel like some people – ironically, very devout people, which is an admirable, disciplined trait, this unshakeable devotion – would need to think about it and pass judgement first – who is this and what do they believe and maybe I can convert them? And yet, pretending I'm Mr. Nice Guy, I sit here and espouse ideas like: People should enter the United States legally. Easy for me to say; I'm already here. But laws are important too. So voting on and modifying laws can be undertaken. I don't think anyone has ever suggested 'voting on and modifying laws' in the Bible, though. Leviticus and so on. I will shut up now....
I like this from Hemingway: "The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places." He also said: "There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; (be) superior to your former self." And a favorite of anyone who knows that thoughtfully jotting down anything at all is harder than it seems, hard to get started, hard to finish contentedly, impossible to do well enough to please one's inner critic: "There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." Hemingway was an active dude. At 61 he took his own life but it's suspected that physical and mental deterioration due to a blood disorder may have played a part. Similar to Robin Williams' unbearable situation perhaps. It doesn't sound like either was afflicted with the same kind of pernicious depression as David Foster Wallace.
Megan asked me, "Why does fear have to be a thing?"
I want to shrink my amygdala. I hope, via genetics, I didn't gift overactive ones to M 'n' m. Although, I would argue there are benefits to a certain amount of sensitivity, alertness, awareness, conscientiousness, competitiveness, intelligence, energy; all of which are bolstered I would think by a little anxiety.
I am not surprised that the words 'arrogance' and 'ignorance' have a similar ring and flow to them when pronounced.
I read something recently in which the author referred to the world as 'morally squishy.' Clever way to put it. But on some level, I feel like we always know what the right thing to do is. There are two sides to every story, but even so…. Kindness is important. But if kindness to one party harms another party, then what? Are there laws involved? Can a majority opinion be reached? In my opinion, there’s more of a firmness to the world, regarding right and wrong; it’s not that squishy. But it’s not always morally black and white either; to believe that is insane. How much do parents impact moral development in their children? Entirely? No. But considerably. Substantially. And actions speak louder than words.
We catch smallmouth bass at Paul's. Also walleye and northern, but smallmouth are the pound-for-pound champs; they fight like beserkers (a Viking term; worth reading about). They're surprisingly powerful and I love that combination: that of being powerful, I mean, but not having a big mouth.
Paul – a nearly lifelong friend of Papa Mike's – has a home, boats, and other toys on Island Lake near Duluth. It's not a busy place. Bears, wolves, bald eagles, loons, and prized fish live there, in big expanses of wilderness, water, and open air. I'm grateful Michael gets to experience it every year, and I do too. Megan doesn't love to fish, and we spend many, many hours doing that, but I want her to see it someday, too. Such places exist and they have charms, and also challenges, quite different than those encountered in, say, downtown Chicago. Thank you, Paul.
It’s challenging to be a great father and have a great career. It’s even more challenging to be a great mother and have a great career. These are controversial comments. But I see parents everywhere taking on the task – parenting, that is – with passion, patience, aplomb, and it’s inspiring to me. Because I know it’s not easy. It’s not stress-free, or inexpensive, or undemanding, or predictable. It’s wonderful though.
I just realized that in the 'Marvel Universe' and the 'DC Universe,' the heroes that headline movies are always not parents. At least Disney / Pixar has The Incredibles.
Why do we seek to provoke inelegance, and disgrace, instead of elegance and grace. In the news media, especially. Social media, despite its vulnerability to misuse and nonsense, is generally better, I think, at exposing us to uplifting things, family photos and good news and opportunities to support, greet, compliment, and advise each other. I’m really only familiar with Facebook though. Not Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or any others.
They say the teen psyche is powerfully averse to criticism and embarrassment.... This might be a very bad thing when cocktailed up with social media.
I don't know if Michael is setting hearts aflutter in junior high. But I do know that my dugout – I'll call it that since I'm the head coach – was visited by five or six girls yesterday, all chipper and chatty and looking for Michael and a couple other guys. When the right girl was in the audience, I was eager to show off. I don't know if this effect made me better or worse; I hope these guys play better. Distractions are okay sometimes if they inspire.
I've bought so many great books for next to nothing at Goodwill stores. I feel guilty. I confess. My latest purchase? A pristine copy of The Varieties of Religious Experience by William James. Light bedtime reading.
I don't believe I live in a 'profoundly sick society' or even a 'sick society' – there are too many good things going on, and good people – but I find myself drawn to this quote: "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society." It's from Krishnamurti. I will learn more about him. Off to YouTube for clips and documentaries.
The two Michaels (Papa Mike and Michael) are both list-makers and productive guys. It appears that lists inspire productivity and creativity. And organization. Well then, I need to make more lists.
Do you ever give credence to the possibility that we reincarnate, that we've had past lives? And what if, when we were 'someone else,' we touched the lives of those who touch our lives now? What if we lived alongside our ancestors somehow, in some way? In mines or factories or foxholes with our grandfathers? What if you were the old doctor who saved your grandma's life when she was young? What if this, what if that... would you carry yourself differently? Do you want to carry yourself differently? Maybe we should ask ourselves questions like these and realize what we can't be sure of. Which, it seems to me, is another way of saying: realize what is possible.
Fundamentalists scare the shit out of me. And not just the jihadi and sharia variety. Some of my evangelical Christian friends I find uncomfortably myopic, rigid, and condemnatory. (For the record, I'm Christian, although, perfect example: certain Christians would say I'm not because my views are too liberal or flexible or inclusive or modern; and I respect, and often praise, other world religions.) I think the litmus test is simple: If someone is drowning, we shouldn't, of course, throw them a barbell, but neither should we even hesitate or put conditions on our help in that moment. Right? I feel like some people – ironically, very devout people, which is an admirable, disciplined trait, this unshakeable devotion – would need to think about it and pass judgement first – who is this and what do they believe and maybe I can convert them? And yet, pretending I'm Mr. Nice Guy, I sit here and espouse ideas like: People should enter the United States legally. Easy for me to say; I'm already here. But laws are important too. So voting on and modifying laws can be undertaken. I don't think anyone has ever suggested 'voting on and modifying laws' in the Bible, though. Leviticus and so on. I will shut up now....
I like this from Hemingway: "The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places." He also said: "There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; (be) superior to your former self." And a favorite of anyone who knows that thoughtfully jotting down anything at all is harder than it seems, hard to get started, hard to finish contentedly, impossible to do well enough to please one's inner critic: "There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." Hemingway was an active dude. At 61 he took his own life but it's suspected that physical and mental deterioration due to a blood disorder may have played a part. Similar to Robin Williams' unbearable situation perhaps. It doesn't sound like either was afflicted with the same kind of pernicious depression as David Foster Wallace.
Megan asked me, "Why does fear have to be a thing?"
I want to shrink my amygdala. I hope, via genetics, I didn't gift overactive ones to M 'n' m. Although, I would argue there are benefits to a certain amount of sensitivity, alertness, awareness, conscientiousness, competitiveness, intelligence, energy; all of which are bolstered I would think by a little anxiety.
I am not surprised that the words 'arrogance' and 'ignorance' have a similar ring and flow to them when pronounced.
I read something recently in which the author referred to the world as 'morally squishy.' Clever way to put it. But on some level, I feel like we always know what the right thing to do is. There are two sides to every story, but even so…. Kindness is important. But if kindness to one party harms another party, then what? Are there laws involved? Can a majority opinion be reached? In my opinion, there’s more of a firmness to the world, regarding right and wrong; it’s not that squishy. But it’s not always morally black and white either; to believe that is insane. How much do parents impact moral development in their children? Entirely? No. But considerably. Substantially. And actions speak louder than words.
We catch smallmouth bass at Paul's. Also walleye and northern, but smallmouth are the pound-for-pound champs; they fight like beserkers (a Viking term; worth reading about). They're surprisingly powerful and I love that combination: that of being powerful, I mean, but not having a big mouth.
Paul – a nearly lifelong friend of Papa Mike's – has a home, boats, and other toys on Island Lake near Duluth. It's not a busy place. Bears, wolves, bald eagles, loons, and prized fish live there, in big expanses of wilderness, water, and open air. I'm grateful Michael gets to experience it every year, and I do too. Megan doesn't love to fish, and we spend many, many hours doing that, but I want her to see it someday, too. Such places exist and they have charms, and also challenges, quite different than those encountered in, say, downtown Chicago. Thank you, Paul.
It’s challenging to be a great father and have a great career. It’s even more challenging to be a great mother and have a great career. These are controversial comments. But I see parents everywhere taking on the task – parenting, that is – with passion, patience, aplomb, and it’s inspiring to me. Because I know it’s not easy. It’s not stress-free, or inexpensive, or undemanding, or predictable. It’s wonderful though.
I just realized that in the 'Marvel Universe' and the 'DC Universe,' the heroes that headline movies are always not parents. At least Disney / Pixar has The Incredibles.
Why do we seek to provoke inelegance, and disgrace, instead of elegance and grace. In the news media, especially. Social media, despite its vulnerability to misuse and nonsense, is generally better, I think, at exposing us to uplifting things, family photos and good news and opportunities to support, greet, compliment, and advise each other. I’m really only familiar with Facebook though. Not Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, or any others.
They say the teen psyche is powerfully averse to criticism and embarrassment.... This might be a very bad thing when cocktailed up with social media.
I don't know if Michael is setting hearts aflutter in junior high. But I do know that my dugout – I'll call it that since I'm the head coach – was visited by five or six girls yesterday, all chipper and chatty and looking for Michael and a couple other guys. When the right girl was in the audience, I was eager to show off. I don't know if this effect made me better or worse; I hope these guys play better. Distractions are okay sometimes if they inspire.
I've bought so many great books for next to nothing at Goodwill stores. I feel guilty. I confess. My latest purchase? A pristine copy of The Varieties of Religious Experience by William James. Light bedtime reading.
I don't believe I live in a 'profoundly sick society' or even a 'sick society' – there are too many good things going on, and good people – but I find myself drawn to this quote: "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society." It's from Krishnamurti. I will learn more about him. Off to YouTube for clips and documentaries.
The two Michaels (Papa Mike and Michael) are both list-makers and productive guys. It appears that lists inspire productivity and creativity. And organization. Well then, I need to make more lists.
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